Thursday, December 13, 2012
This is how it starts....
Monday, December 3, 2012
The Talk
I went on a second date with "B" on Friday. Lunch on Fountain Square then a walk down to the Freedom Center Museum to see an exhibit. The conversation was great, the company was even greater. And as an added bonus he was happy to tag along while I drooled over the sparkly things at Tiffany & Co and was patient while I looked over the Coach and Michael Kors options at Macy's! Ladies and Gentlemen (I don't think I even have any male followers but whatevs) I think we may have a keeper!
I know what you're thinking...CurvyGirl are you really that shallow that all it takes is a shopping trip to win you over? I'll admit that a shopping trip is definitely a way to earn points with this girl, but what really won me over was what happened after the date. Get your mind out of the gutter you nasty thing you!!
The day after the date we were having a wonderful phone conversation and I decided that it was time to have "The Talk". Being a parent of a child with medical needs, I've found that not everyone can handle our life. So at a certain point, I feel it's important to give a run down of what we deal with on a day to day basis in our lives. Taking care of J-man and some of the advocacy work I've done for his disorder makes this part of our lives very much a part of who I am. I feel that if a potential suitor is going to really get to know me, they should get to know ALL of me.
Let me just say that this has not always been easy. I've had guys never call again after "The Talk". I've had guys that hang in there after "The Talk" only to bail when things really get real and they see the number of doctor's and hospital visits our life includes. And then there is the occasional guy that really is willing to accept and learn about our lives and try to make it work. I really just never know what the post-talk aftermath is going to look like.
I'mhappy...no, happy is not enough...I'm ecstatically optimistic after the way "The Talk" went. He didn't freak out and hurry to get off the phone (like some others have done). He didn't try to minimize the scope of what we're dealing with (have had that happen a time or two) Instead, he was understanding and asked a lot of great questions. He listened as I talked about our non-profit organization that I'm so passionate about. And then the most awesome thing happened...the conversation moved on. And it wasn't because it was awkwardly time to change the subject. It was because we had just finished talking about it for the time being. It was the most natural segue out of that topic I think I've ever experienced. And when we finally got off the phone (after talking for over an hour and a half) he confirmed my suspicions that he was truly someone special with a single text that said "Thank you for being you"
It's still early and I know that, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that I really like this guy! Date #3 is already set for Saturday!
I know what you're thinking...CurvyGirl are you really that shallow that all it takes is a shopping trip to win you over? I'll admit that a shopping trip is definitely a way to earn points with this girl, but what really won me over was what happened after the date. Get your mind out of the gutter you nasty thing you!!
The day after the date we were having a wonderful phone conversation and I decided that it was time to have "The Talk". Being a parent of a child with medical needs, I've found that not everyone can handle our life. So at a certain point, I feel it's important to give a run down of what we deal with on a day to day basis in our lives. Taking care of J-man and some of the advocacy work I've done for his disorder makes this part of our lives very much a part of who I am. I feel that if a potential suitor is going to really get to know me, they should get to know ALL of me.
Let me just say that this has not always been easy. I've had guys never call again after "The Talk". I've had guys that hang in there after "The Talk" only to bail when things really get real and they see the number of doctor's and hospital visits our life includes. And then there is the occasional guy that really is willing to accept and learn about our lives and try to make it work. I really just never know what the post-talk aftermath is going to look like.
I'm
It's still early and I know that, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that I really like this guy! Date #3 is already set for Saturday!
Monday, November 26, 2012
She's BACK!!!
Shame, Shame CurvyGirl!!! I've been terrible about posting anything. If it's any consolation to my "legion" of followers, you haven't missed much! But since things are starting to kind of take off a little, I figured I should get back into writing again.
The prospects:
"D" - Great guy that I met through work several years ago. We "dated" very casually then and now have started talking more again now. He's an amazing guy, and in the healthcare field which is a bonus because he not only understands but is not scared by J-man's health challenges. We laugh and talk and no matter how much time has gone by, we can pick up the friendship where we left off. Not to mention, quality time with D is always enjoyable! However D is scared to be in a relationship. We've had some long conversations about what he's scared about. In summary, I told him that while I'm not waiting around for him, if I should happen to be uninvolved when he finally gets his act together, I'd love to see where things go. Speaking of getting involved...
"B" - Nice guy in manufacturing that I met through that dating website. We've been chatting for a few weeks and went on our first date yesterday afternoon for a late lunch. He's intelligent, great personality, and is pretty cute too! Date went really well and I really enjoyed spending time with him. Conversation really flowed well. So here's the problem. He's in a different city that's about 1 hour drive away. I'm trying not to jump too far ahead, but I also don't want to waste time on something that won't work in the long term either. His job has him anchored in his city and while in theory I could change jobs and relocate to that city since J-man would still have access to the hospital/doctors he's currently with, I'm not sure it's something I'd be willing to do. But I'm getting way ahead of myself. These are just the things that are going through my mind currently. Let's get through a few more dates and we'll see what happens. In the meantime I'm enjoying the possibilities!
In other news....
I uploaded some new pictures and low and behold I'm starting to get some more traffic on my profile. Maybe there will be more frequent updates from CurvyGirl. In the meantime, I'm still open to those blind dates!!!
The prospects:
"D" - Great guy that I met through work several years ago. We "dated" very casually then and now have started talking more again now. He's an amazing guy, and in the healthcare field which is a bonus because he not only understands but is not scared by J-man's health challenges. We laugh and talk and no matter how much time has gone by, we can pick up the friendship where we left off. Not to mention, quality time with D is always enjoyable! However D is scared to be in a relationship. We've had some long conversations about what he's scared about. In summary, I told him that while I'm not waiting around for him, if I should happen to be uninvolved when he finally gets his act together, I'd love to see where things go. Speaking of getting involved...
"B" - Nice guy in manufacturing that I met through that dating website. We've been chatting for a few weeks and went on our first date yesterday afternoon for a late lunch. He's intelligent, great personality, and is pretty cute too! Date went really well and I really enjoyed spending time with him. Conversation really flowed well. So here's the problem. He's in a different city that's about 1 hour drive away. I'm trying not to jump too far ahead, but I also don't want to waste time on something that won't work in the long term either. His job has him anchored in his city and while in theory I could change jobs and relocate to that city since J-man would still have access to the hospital/doctors he's currently with, I'm not sure it's something I'd be willing to do. But I'm getting way ahead of myself. These are just the things that are going through my mind currently. Let's get through a few more dates and we'll see what happens. In the meantime I'm enjoying the possibilities!
In other news....
I uploaded some new pictures and low and behold I'm starting to get some more traffic on my profile. Maybe there will be more frequent updates from CurvyGirl. In the meantime, I'm still open to those blind dates!!!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Pass the Collection Plate
So the online dating scene hasn't been going well. A few conversations here and there, but nothing was really going anywhere. Then as I'm driving in the car one of the DJ's on the radio mentions a match making service that's available locally that sets people up. The thing that really appealed to me was that they set people up on lunch dates. Since I only work 4 days a week, that leaves one day to have a date without making a major production out of it by arranging childcare etc.
The other thing I liked was that they take all the guesswork out of who to initiate the date with. Everyone has a sit down interview and they will only match you with someone you're really going to click with. I liked the idea that it skipped through the silly getting to know you phase of online dating and went back to the old fashioned way of getting to know your date in person through conversation. Sounds great, right? This is CurvyGirl we're talking about here, so you know it couldn't be that easy...
I fill out the online form to request more information and just got off the phone with the representative from the company. She was very cheery and we really had a great time chatting. Then comes the part when she tells me about the fees. To be honest, I was prepared for anywhere between $500 and $700. Uh...not so much...for a year's subscription (with a guaranteed 10 introductions) it was $2000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Alternatively I could choose the 6 month subscription (with a guaranteed 5 introductions) for a bargain basement price of $1850!!! Who the hell would choose the 6 month subscription?!?! My mouth literally dropped open and I have never been so grateful that video phones didn't take off the way they were predicted to. I also now know why that woman was so damn perky.
Let's just entertain the notion that we're in a parallel universe and I have an extra $2000 laying around for this service...the plus side would be that I'd be introduced to men with the type of residual income that would suit my penchant for Coach and Prada. Not to mention, anyone that would spend that type of cash is clearly serious about meeting someone. But since in this particular dimension, I don't have that sort of money I'll now be accepting donations via paypal. Alternatively, I'm also now more open to those blind date offers that I've turned down in the past...
The other thing I liked was that they take all the guesswork out of who to initiate the date with. Everyone has a sit down interview and they will only match you with someone you're really going to click with. I liked the idea that it skipped through the silly getting to know you phase of online dating and went back to the old fashioned way of getting to know your date in person through conversation. Sounds great, right? This is CurvyGirl we're talking about here, so you know it couldn't be that easy...
I fill out the online form to request more information and just got off the phone with the representative from the company. She was very cheery and we really had a great time chatting. Then comes the part when she tells me about the fees. To be honest, I was prepared for anywhere between $500 and $700. Uh...not so much...for a year's subscription (with a guaranteed 10 introductions) it was $2000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Alternatively I could choose the 6 month subscription (with a guaranteed 5 introductions) for a bargain basement price of $1850!!! Who the hell would choose the 6 month subscription?!?! My mouth literally dropped open and I have never been so grateful that video phones didn't take off the way they were predicted to. I also now know why that woman was so damn perky.
Let's just entertain the notion that we're in a parallel universe and I have an extra $2000 laying around for this service...the plus side would be that I'd be introduced to men with the type of residual income that would suit my penchant for Coach and Prada. Not to mention, anyone that would spend that type of cash is clearly serious about meeting someone. But since in this particular dimension, I don't have that sort of money I'll now be accepting donations via paypal. Alternatively, I'm also now more open to those blind date offers that I've turned down in the past...
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Keep hope alive
Today I got a notification that someone wanted to initiate a phone call with me through the dating website. I'll admit, I did get a little rush of excitement that someone was interested. Let me tell you, after a few weeks of nothing, it was nice to have some "action". So I log onto the site and....it's some 50 year old balding man. Uh...no thanks.
But because hope springs eternal, I take the time to go through the daily connections that are sent to me. As I open up one profile, this is what I read:
I'AM A FUN LOVING KIND MAN I TRY TO ENJOY LIFE TO THE FULLLESS AM WORKING ON BEING A CHIRSTAIN AM YOUNG I USELY DATE OLDER WOMAN NONE REALLY MY AGE I'AM 34 YRS OLE I JUST TRY TO ENJOY LIFE IT'S SELF I LIKE KIDS A WHOLE LOT IVE HAVE SOME MYSLF,I STAY FARAWAY FROM DRAMA I DONT LIKE THAT STUFF IN MY LIFE AND DNT NEEDOR WONT IT.AM VERY PRIVATE AND LIKE TO GO OUT BUT NOT TO CLUBS OR HOUSE PARTYS I RATHER STAY HOME IF I HAVE TO DO ALL THAT.I LOVE TO GO FISHING IN MY SPEAR TIME ALSO AND HOPE THAT I CAN FIND A FRIEND THAT WILL ENJOY DOING SOME OF THE SAME THINGS I DO THANK YOU TONY
*SIGH* It's posts like these that just make me tired. It's one thing not to be able to carry on a conversation when you have to think on your feet (not a quality I would accept in a mate, but I understand how that can be difficult for some people). But it's entirely different when this is in a post...run the frigging spell check for crying out loud!! The grammar (or lack thereof) makes my head hurt! And explain to me how he likes to go out but would rather stay home?? Which is it buddy?? Now typically I don't put full names in my blog, but if this guy is going to have his name blasted all over the dating site, then who am I to stop him? I did him a favor by removing his last name. Consider it my good deed for the evening.
I'm not quite ready to give up hope yet, but days like today make throwing in the towel seem like an attractive option. There's always tomorrow though, right?
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Tuesday's Thoughts....
Nothing major to report on the dating front, but had some things on my mind and then I realized...that's what blogging is for, right?
I got an invite to a movie night at a friend's house. I went to look at the invite because I was wondering if my recent ex "R" would be there. It didn't surprise me to see his name on the invite list especially since the friend that is hosting said party I "inherited" in our first break up about 4 years ago. But what threw me was that it was R +1. Yes. He's already seeing someone enough to have said woman included on the invitation. *sigh*
Yes, your Honor, I would like to plead guilty to the charge of Facebook stalking. Something I don't typically do and am a little embarrassed to admit that I did. However, it did pay off because the +1 looks like a man. Ironically she looks a lot like "R". Wonder what kind of commentary that says about his personality...confirms his narcissistic tendencies?? Perhaps. Made me feel slightly better? Definitely. But now comes the decision on whether to attend this party...alone... I find myself wishing I was dating someone long enough to invite them. I know it's not a competition, but I have this need to make it clear that I'm fine without him (which I am) and I'm moving on (which I'm trying to do). Who knows what I'm going to do. I'm not going to respond to the invite yet. I've got about a month to figure it out. So maybe by then, who knows??
I got an invite to a movie night at a friend's house. I went to look at the invite because I was wondering if my recent ex "R" would be there. It didn't surprise me to see his name on the invite list especially since the friend that is hosting said party I "inherited" in our first break up about 4 years ago. But what threw me was that it was R +1. Yes. He's already seeing someone enough to have said woman included on the invitation. *sigh*
Yes, your Honor, I would like to plead guilty to the charge of Facebook stalking. Something I don't typically do and am a little embarrassed to admit that I did. However, it did pay off because the +1 looks like a man. Ironically she looks a lot like "R". Wonder what kind of commentary that says about his personality...confirms his narcissistic tendencies?? Perhaps. Made me feel slightly better? Definitely. But now comes the decision on whether to attend this party...alone... I find myself wishing I was dating someone long enough to invite them. I know it's not a competition, but I have this need to make it clear that I'm fine without him (which I am) and I'm moving on (which I'm trying to do). Who knows what I'm going to do. I'm not going to respond to the invite yet. I've got about a month to figure it out. So maybe by then, who knows??
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Best laid plans...
Today I thought my post was going to be about my excitement about the dinner date I had planned with "B" this evening. We were supposed to meet up after he took his son back to his mother's house (it was his weekend with him). However, he communicated earlier today that she just told him that she wouldn't be home until later in the evening. Too late to start a date for tonight....So the dinner plans are on hold until next weekend. And thus begins some of the insecurity that still plagues me despite my best efforts. Was this just an excuse? Being a single parent, it's definitely plausible. Hell, I have my son every single day so I know that scheduling can be a challenge. However, I can't help but wonder...
That being said, I plan on using the "once is a mistake, twice is a bad habit" rule. Whether "B" realizes it or not, he used up that first chance this weekend. Seems harsh maybe, but I'm trying to follow my friend Trenia's rules about demanding respect from the outset. I went through the effort to secure childcare so that we could go out. If he can't respect my time as much as I respect his then it's not worth pursuing any further. Hopefully, this is just a fluke since I really do enjoy talking to him.
Anyways, hope you all are enjoying your weekend! I'm having a blast watching the Olympic coverage. Have a great day!
Friday, July 27, 2012
Reading is Fundamental
Before I decided to dive back into the dating scene I felt I should do some research. After all, I'm now 33 years old and never been married or even really had a serious relationship that has lasted more than 6 months in over 9 years. Something is definitely not right, and before I blame every guy I've been with (which would be easy to do) I decided that I needed to look within to see what (if anything) could/should be changed about the common denominator (me). Lucky for me, my friend and high school classmate (who happens to be a relationship coach) recently published a book entitled "The Curvy Girl's Guide to Dating". How perfect is that, right? It's like she wrote it just for me! As I told Trenia, many ideas in the book are things that I have heard before, however she managed to put them in a different light and from a different perspective that caused me to think a little bit more about the relationships I choose to enter. I will say, it's been helpful in this go 'round of online dating. Instead of trying to find redeeming qualities in those have shown interest in me, I'm finally just simply telling them I'm not interested. Trenia's book helped me realize how I've settled in the past for "good enough" instead of waiting for "what I really want". You can purchase Trenia's book from Amazon by clicking here
Which brings me to Bachelor #1. "B", is a 33 year old father of a 9 year old boy. He's been divorced for 4 years and has joint custody of his son. B and I started emailing each other last week and seem to click. Eventually he offered me his cell number and stated if I wanted to text him during the day that would be great. We started texting back and forth (sorry Trenia! I know that was breaking a "rule"!) But to his credit after texting during the day at work he asked if it would be OK to call me. He did last night and we wound up talking for about 2.5 hours. It was a great conversation and I'm looking forward to this evening (he's already asked if it would be alright to call me again tonight). So B is definitely a contender. We're making plans for getting together and meeting in person already!
Meanwhile there are about 2 or 3 other Bachelor's that I am in various stages of sending messages to. No one else is really standing out from the crowd, right now so stay tuned to see if any of those contenders develop into something more...
In other romantic writing themed news...my dear friend Tatum Throne just released her third book! Curvy Girl made a cameo in book two! I'm hoping one of these days I'll get a starring role. I'd like to have my HEA (happily ever after for you non-romance readers), even if it's a work of fiction! Please check out her blog here. Fair warning, her books are STEAMY!! Congrats on book 3 Tatum!
Which brings me to Bachelor #1. "B", is a 33 year old father of a 9 year old boy. He's been divorced for 4 years and has joint custody of his son. B and I started emailing each other last week and seem to click. Eventually he offered me his cell number and stated if I wanted to text him during the day that would be great. We started texting back and forth (sorry Trenia! I know that was breaking a "rule"!) But to his credit after texting during the day at work he asked if it would be OK to call me. He did last night and we wound up talking for about 2.5 hours. It was a great conversation and I'm looking forward to this evening (he's already asked if it would be alright to call me again tonight). So B is definitely a contender. We're making plans for getting together and meeting in person already!
Meanwhile there are about 2 or 3 other Bachelor's that I am in various stages of sending messages to. No one else is really standing out from the crowd, right now so stay tuned to see if any of those contenders develop into something more...
In other romantic writing themed news...my dear friend Tatum Throne just released her third book! Curvy Girl made a cameo in book two! I'm hoping one of these days I'll get a starring role. I'd like to have my HEA (happily ever after for you non-romance readers), even if it's a work of fiction! Please check out her blog here. Fair warning, her books are STEAMY!! Congrats on book 3 Tatum!
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Lessons Learned....
So Curvy Girl took a break from the dating arena for a few months. This was after rekindling a romance with Mr. R. I won't bore you with the gory details, let's just say that the "R" didn't stand for "Right". So, as I have been told many times before, they're your "ex" for a reason. So after shedding a few tears, I decided to get back in the game again by renewing my subscription to that online dating site. This oughta get interesting...
Speaking of which, I already got a message from my first loser...Seriously here's the message: "would it be bad if your man was hung" Really?? That's your opening line?? Way to keep it classy "Blue eyed guy". My response: "Hung from what? A tree? Yeah...that would be pretty bad..." Never did get a response. I thought it was pretty witty!
But I have started talking with a couple guys that may have potential. Can I just say how much I hate the awkward getting to know you phase of online dating? This is the drawback to meeting people this way as opposed to just meeting them in the store or on the street and getting to know each other through a series of dates where there are plenty of other distractions/conversation starters. Besides, to have a true appreciation of snarkiness that I've turned into an art form, it really has to be experienced in person.
So off we go again! I'm determined to find love, even if it kills me (and it just might!)
Speaking of which, I already got a message from my first loser...Seriously here's the message: "would it be bad if your man was hung" Really?? That's your opening line?? Way to keep it classy "Blue eyed guy". My response: "Hung from what? A tree? Yeah...that would be pretty bad..." Never did get a response. I thought it was pretty witty!
But I have started talking with a couple guys that may have potential. Can I just say how much I hate the awkward getting to know you phase of online dating? This is the drawback to meeting people this way as opposed to just meeting them in the store or on the street and getting to know each other through a series of dates where there are plenty of other distractions/conversation starters. Besides, to have a true appreciation of snarkiness that I've turned into an art form, it really has to be experienced in person.
So off we go again! I'm determined to find love, even if it kills me (and it just might!)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)