Ghosts of Boyfriends Past

I know this is supposed to be my observations of my current dating life, but in the past 24 hours I've been contacted by 2 exes. Both stating that they miss me...they were stupid for letting me go, blah, blah blah. Now normally I would quote a line made famous by a Cee-Lo song. If it was anyone but these two particular people.

Ex #1 is someone I'll never be rid of. He's the father of my child. And I'll be the first to tell you that he's been a total ASS and has done nothing for either of us. That includes child support, emotional support or anything that generally goes along with being a good parent. We do still talk on occasion, but last night was completely different. Don't worry, I have no delusions of grandeur. I'm not kidding myself. I know who he is and how he can be. And I don't think I can ever forgive him for hurting my son. However, the conversation does remind me of how things used to be. Of who he could be. I'd be lying if I didn't think how nice it would be to be a real family. The whole conversation was surreal...it was nice to not have a hostile conversation with him. But then the sun rises and with it brings reality. That is a life I will never know. What I can hope is that he can get his act together enough to recognize what he's missing out on by not seeing our sweet child grow up. The one good thing that came out of the conversation was that I've recognized that I've finally forgiven him. There is an inner peace that I have in dealing with him. I'm grateful for him entering my life because without him, I wouldn't have my son. So for those reasons, I wish him well. I want to see him succeed and be a better person if for no other reason that it will be best for my son.

Ex #2 is someone I can't seem to stay away from even though I probably should. We dated a for a few months a few years back. With him having sole custody of his children and me with my little man, we had a happy little unit together. Lots of chemistry, the kids got along. We all loved each other. Then life happened. My J-man was diagnosed and my life turned upside down. Then the ex got bogged down with work and trying to manage his own household. Eventually it was time to just call it quits. It was one of the most difficult break ups because we weren't fighting. Nothing "bad" happened. Just life. Being contacted by him just brings up all the thoughts about what could have been. He wants to meet up for a meal, and I'm sure I'll probably agree to it, like a fool. And it figures he would show his face right when I'm moving on with the new prospects.

The Contenders...

Yeah...so it's been a while since I've posted anything. That's because there wasn't much to write about. Well, I suppose I could have written about the random guy that I met at the gas station. He seemed nice enough. Exchanged numbers. Then the texting began. And kept going...and going...and going. Seriously, he was like the Energizer Bunny with the constant texting. At first it was cute/endearing. It was sweet that he was texting me to say good morning. Then it started happening every morning. And then came the mid-day, afternoon and evening texts. Stalker, much? Anyways...had to politely tell him I was no longer interested.

Then there was a bit of a dry spell. Let me tell you how good that is for the self esteem...lots of people looking at your profile but no one gives any indication that they're interested. Sometimes that "Who's Viewed You" is a blessing and a curse... Right when I was ready to give up and cancel the account, the romantic flood gates opened. And it seemed to come from all directions. So here's a run-down of the contenders.

1. Mr. A - this is a guy that I met from a dating site about 3 years ago and we went on a couple dates, didn't really pan out. We were friends on a popular social networking site but never really talked much. We went out once last year but in our conversations he obviously wasn't over the ex-gf he had dated after me. Flash forward to this year and we've reconnected...again...we haven't gone out yet, but who knows? Third time could be the charm, right?
2. Mr. T - no...not that one, silly...lol This guy is someone I knew from high school. We were good friends then. Of course we found each other through that social networking site a few years ago. After the intial catch up of where our lives were we really didn't talk much for a few years. Then out of the blue I get a message from him. Says I'm looking good and he wants to meet up for coffee. Tells me I should call him so we can talk. Could it be the new pictures that have been posted showing off the brand new me caught his eye? Your guess is as good as mine. Either way it will be nice to see an old friend.
3. Mr. C - new online friend that I've been having great conversation with. We've been messaging back and forth and I think I'm close to giving him my number *gasp* He's a mental health counselor (it would be nice to have one on call anytime I needed it). Seems really nice so far. Stay tuned...
4. Mr. D - another new online friend that came onto the scene the same day Mr. C did. Wonder if they featured my profile or something...Anyways, he seems nice enough. In his profile he says he's quiet though. I've dated quiet guys and it never works. In case you can't tell I like to talk. But more than that I like to have a conversation, which means that there are points where I'm not talking and the other person is. Not to mention he lives about an hour and half away. Let's be realistic about how a relationship will work with that kind of distance. But, I'm not going to count him out just yet. There may be a phone call to him on the horizon very soon too.

So there you have it. Welcome to the world of online dating...It's either feast or famine. I do want to settle down, but for now I'm going to enjoy my possibilities and the fact that I have some choices. :)